What Happens When You Make a Mistake as a Therapist
Every therapist reaches this moment eventually. Something happens in a session, or right after it, and your stomach drops. Maybe you said the wrong thing. Maybe you missed something. Maybe you're not even sure you did anything wrong, but the doubt has already moved in.
This happens to every therapist, no matter how many years they've been practising. What actually matters is what you do next.
Three Things to Ask Yourself
1. What actually happened, separate from the story your anxiety is telling you? Write down the facts first, before anything gets added on top.
2. Is this a clinical concern, an ethical concern, or a confidence wobble? These need completely different responses, and naming which one brings the whole thing back down to a manageable size.
3. What would you want a colleague to know if they brought you this exact situation? You'd probably be so much kinder to them than you're being to yourself right now.
Three Things To Do
1. Write it down while it's fresh. Plainly, without any self judgment attached, just what happened.
2. Check if anything needs immediate action. Client safety, documentation, a follow up call. Handle the practical piece separately from the emotional piece.
3. Book time with your supervisor. Ideally someone external and impartial, so you can think it through before you have to explain it to anyone else.
Why external supervision is the best place to bring it
Bringing a mistake to your internal supervisor can feel risky. There's a hierarchy, and an undeniable power dynamic. When your supervisor is also responsible for your pay, your referrals, or your performance reviews, it can be hard to be truly vulnerable about a potential mistake while you're also thinking about your job security.
External supervision gives you somewhere separate to think it through first. Someone with no stake in the business, and no agenda beyond helping you become a clearer, more capable clinician. That changes how honest you can actually be, about whether there was really a mistake at all, and what to do next.
What Your Supervisor Actually Asks You
Most supervisors, myself included, work through it using something like the Gibbs Reflective Cycle, alongside the code of ethics and standards of practice for your regulatory body.
We'll explore what happened. What you were feeling then, and what you're feeling now. What felt okay and what didn't. Why it unfolded that way. What you need to do now. What you'd do differently if it ever came up again. And one thing you'll carry into your next session because of it.
It's a guided reflection, not an interrogation, and it turns a moment you're dreading into one of the most useful conversations you'll have all month.
If you’re a psychotherapist or social worker in Ontario, Canada, carrying something you haven’t yet felt ready to say out loud, you don’t have to navigate it alone. Book a FREE 20-minute consultation here.
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